set your mind on better days
2003-09-17 - 10:30 p.m.

My essay is dense and undoable, I'm kind of panicked and yet kind of not, which is kind of panic-worthy in itself.

My forms of procrastination grow more bizarre too - where yesterday we had solitaire, today we have shirtless redecorating.

By redecorating I mean pushing the excess furniture into each end of the room, giving me a little space in the middle. Not enough to cartwheel, well maybe enough if I could actually do a cartwheel and I didn't mind hitting a flailing limb on excess furniture.

And I don't know why I'm shirtless either, I'm having hot flashes, I've even got the air conditioner on. This might be a good look if I were male. As it stands I just look weird for getting off on the redecorating aspect of things.

I found a daddy long legs spider under an unused chair. I've put the chair on top of a filing cabinet on the corner, and put my parasol umbrella up to hide the spider's lair, give him/her some privacy. I've shared this room with daddy long legs spiders since I was 4, and they've shared it with me and it's terribly crazy of me but I respect them for that.

I need a fast-forward button. Because it seems I'm stuck on replay. Do you feel that too? These past two years seem like the same basic day x 654, I just rehash the same old sentiments about the same old events in a slightly different way.

Essay, essay, panic, panic. Etc, etc.


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