2002-12-24 - 3:04 p.m.
'Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the house, nothing was stirring ... except for a girl furiously wrapping packages and shrieking "Have you seen the sticky tape?!"
Peaceful thought, isn't it.
Wow, I just noticed I have had a chocolate sitting in front of me for the past ten minutes. That has to be recorded as the longest survival rate of any chocolate in my vicinity ever.
Are you ready for Christmas yet? I sure as hell am not, and I suggest should you get the opportunity you should save us all a lot of grief and slay Santa.
My personal preferred method would be lighting a fire under his butt, but wrapping him up as a giant present and letting him suffocate is also acceptable.
Yeah, yeah, the holidays sometimes make normal people a little depressed, but me, I don't know, I just feel like killing people.
*big smile* I'm kidding, really, I am... or am I? Muahahahaha. Think there are any murderers in diaryland? Chances are yes, right? I mean, with so many Americans around here ... hehehe.
No, I'm kidding, except that my kid does have a basis in reality what with the whole America being intent on violence scenario. Over 11 000 shootings, blah blah, most murders in the world happening in Chicago, blah blah, and let's not even start with the war on terror...
I don't know where I'm going with this, I have no real point to make... I just think we need to be giving more mirrors to America so they can see themselves, because obviously they have no idea... And if these mirrors happen to take the form of a good old fashioned mocking, then I'm there.
Who am I kidding, I'd probably be there even for purposeless mock.
Christmas, christmas, christmas... Think all my bah-humbug-ing will make the spirits of Christmas past, present, and future visit me? Remind me to wear pretty pyjamas just incase.
We have a five and a half kilo turkey sitting in our fridge. As I was reaching for the butter I half bumped into it's dish and caught myself apologising to the turkey. Because on top of being slaughtered and defeathered and soon being roasted and eaten, it also had to be almost touched by me. As if the other horrors weren't enough.
Now if you'll excuse me there are presents to be wrapped up, and copious amounts of cookies to be left and consumed bysanta me.
Peaceful thought, isn't it.
Wow, I just noticed I have had a chocolate sitting in front of me for the past ten minutes. That has to be recorded as the longest survival rate of any chocolate in my vicinity ever.
Are you ready for Christmas yet? I sure as hell am not, and I suggest should you get the opportunity you should save us all a lot of grief and slay Santa.
My personal preferred method would be lighting a fire under his butt, but wrapping him up as a giant present and letting him suffocate is also acceptable.
Yeah, yeah, the holidays sometimes make normal people a little depressed, but me, I don't know, I just feel like killing people.
*big smile* I'm kidding, really, I am... or am I? Muahahahaha. Think there are any murderers in diaryland? Chances are yes, right? I mean, with so many Americans around here ... hehehe.
No, I'm kidding, except that my kid does have a basis in reality what with the whole America being intent on violence scenario. Over 11 000 shootings, blah blah, most murders in the world happening in Chicago, blah blah, and let's not even start with the war on terror...
I don't know where I'm going with this, I have no real point to make... I just think we need to be giving more mirrors to America so they can see themselves, because obviously they have no idea... And if these mirrors happen to take the form of a good old fashioned mocking, then I'm there.
Who am I kidding, I'd probably be there even for purposeless mock.
Christmas, christmas, christmas... Think all my bah-humbug-ing will make the spirits of Christmas past, present, and future visit me? Remind me to wear pretty pyjamas just incase.
We have a five and a half kilo turkey sitting in our fridge. As I was reaching for the butter I half bumped into it's dish and caught myself apologising to the turkey. Because on top of being slaughtered and defeathered and soon being roasted and eaten, it also had to be almost touched by me. As if the other horrors weren't enough.
Now if you'll excuse me there are presents to be wrapped up, and copious amounts of cookies to be left and consumed by
