Essay: Babs, why don't I exist yet?

Babs: shrug.

Procrastination Monster: Gromble gromble, Babs' ass is mine! Gromble gromble.

Essay: You're already 3 days late! can't you feel the precious precious marks slipping away??

Babs: shrug.

Procrastination Monster: Gromble, she with me now bud! Muahaha-gromble-ahaha.

Essay: But if you don't sit down and create me, you'll be throwing away your academic career!

Babs: shrug.

Procrastination Monster: Excuse gromble me, but can you pipe down now? I tryna eat my gromble babs dinner, she is good anda tastes like chickened, gromble.

Essay: ... chicken?

Babs: I always thought I'd have more of a cocoa-based flavour, personally.

Procrastination Monster: No, the cliche is true, everyone tastes like chicken. That reminds me of a funny story actually, this one time I was eating this deep-fried Mexican-

Essay: Uh, I think you're missing the point.

Babs: ... there was a point?

Procrastination Monster: What is this point you speak of?! And how dare you, a mere non-existent essay, interrupt MY amusing anecdote!! ... er ... gromble.

Essay: ... Do me! Do me damnit!

Babs: I don't like needy men.

Procrastination Monster: Screw this babs gromble, let's go back to my lair and watch some gromble tv. I think Punk'd is on tonight...

Babs: I love it when you talk dirty. Let's roll!

Essay: ... shrug.

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