2003-05-13 - 5:21 p.m.
Today has been a happily fork-free day for my heart, hurrah, it was probably only psychological, which is a yay because you can't die from stuff your head makes up right? right?
Although not a pain free day entirely, my abdomen really hurts, stupid pilates. Last night I went to a pilates class after visiting the uni library since I had been intending to go for a while and if I didn't do it then I don't think I would ever have made it.
Anyway, the sum of last night was:
*walking through uni campus at night while it's all pretty and lit up is really fun
*gym is seriously packed at night time, packed with young and annoyingly attractive people, who you really want to prod just because they make you feel more fat
*pilates was weird, slow paced and yet incredibly painful at points. The flexibility some people could achieve was rather amazing though. At one point we had to put our palms flat on the floor as our legs stretched out as far as possible, which I just barely managed, but some people could put their elbows on the floor. Seriously. Elbows.
I'm not sure if I'll go back. I liked the pace but I'm not that big a fan of floorwork. Or any work really. We'll see.
Today I got dragged to the UNSW counsellor people, to see if there's anything that can be done to reduce the emotional disadvantage thing I have going. If Colleen hadn't gone with me I so would have cancelled, I feel kind of better for going but it was pretty much as I expected.
Counsellor recommended seeing equity people because I am disadvantaged, and I did later on and though they were very sympathetic and did seem to think I was disadvantaged as I don't technically fit their description of being disadvantaged they couldn't really help instead recommending that I -
*apply for special consideration, a possibility already rejected by me and the counsellor since I don't really fit the criteria.
*talk to my lecturer and some of my course administrators, although I already know there's little that they could do since it isn't an internal transfer but through uac, so the thing they're likely to do is recommend I see a counsellor.
I don't fit in anywhere, are you getting that? The counsellor said the problem was complex, which was kind of a wow, you think I have a problem? Wow. I've been holding onto the belief that the reason I'm struggling so much is not because I have a problem but because I am an idiot. So that classified as a wow.
So today consisted of tuning out of ling and being shunted around a lot, something I'll be finding discouraging in oh about five minutes, but for now it's just nice to be moving a little.
I have another appointment next week so maybe we can make some progress. Just get me through this year, Mr Counsellor Man, get me through this year.
Or even this week would be good. Have yet to make heads or tails of the psych assignment due Friday. And my abs hurt.
Gilmore Girls is on tonight and I didn't cry during the appointment with the counsellor (I teared up, which doesn't count, I had something in my eye! Something in my eye! And okay, they were tears, but, eh) so today was relatively good.
Although not a pain free day entirely, my abdomen really hurts, stupid pilates. Last night I went to a pilates class after visiting the uni library since I had been intending to go for a while and if I didn't do it then I don't think I would ever have made it.
Anyway, the sum of last night was:
*walking through uni campus at night while it's all pretty and lit up is really fun
*gym is seriously packed at night time, packed with young and annoyingly attractive people, who you really want to prod just because they make you feel more fat
*pilates was weird, slow paced and yet incredibly painful at points. The flexibility some people could achieve was rather amazing though. At one point we had to put our palms flat on the floor as our legs stretched out as far as possible, which I just barely managed, but some people could put their elbows on the floor. Seriously. Elbows.
I'm not sure if I'll go back. I liked the pace but I'm not that big a fan of floorwork. Or any work really. We'll see.
Today I got dragged to the UNSW counsellor people, to see if there's anything that can be done to reduce the emotional disadvantage thing I have going. If Colleen hadn't gone with me I so would have cancelled, I feel kind of better for going but it was pretty much as I expected.
Counsellor recommended seeing equity people because I am disadvantaged, and I did later on and though they were very sympathetic and did seem to think I was disadvantaged as I don't technically fit their description of being disadvantaged they couldn't really help instead recommending that I -
*apply for special consideration, a possibility already rejected by me and the counsellor since I don't really fit the criteria.
*talk to my lecturer and some of my course administrators, although I already know there's little that they could do since it isn't an internal transfer but through uac, so the thing they're likely to do is recommend I see a counsellor.
I don't fit in anywhere, are you getting that? The counsellor said the problem was complex, which was kind of a wow, you think I have a problem? Wow. I've been holding onto the belief that the reason I'm struggling so much is not because I have a problem but because I am an idiot. So that classified as a wow.
So today consisted of tuning out of ling and being shunted around a lot, something I'll be finding discouraging in oh about five minutes, but for now it's just nice to be moving a little.
I have another appointment next week so maybe we can make some progress. Just get me through this year, Mr Counsellor Man, get me through this year.
Or even this week would be good. Have yet to make heads or tails of the psych assignment due Friday. And my abs hurt.
Gilmore Girls is on tonight and I didn't cry during the appointment with the counsellor (I teared up, which doesn't count, I had something in my eye! Something in my eye! And okay, they were tears, but, eh) so today was relatively good.
